There’s Only ONE Thing that Matters

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success advice from the greats. Today we’re going to talk about dieing for what you believe in… literally.

As many of you know, today is St. George’s Day, the feast in celebration of the man who’s patron saint of more countries and cities than I’m willing to list (England, Georgia and Malta are on there, though). And though he’s most famous for a debatable story about killing a dragon to save a princess, St. George was a real man.

Now, I’ve done a couple of these saint posts (check them out, if you haven’t already: St. Patrick, St. David) but this fella might be one of the harder ones to find information on. He was supposedly a Greek born in Palestine to nobility who ended up as a tribune (second-in-command of the basic Roman military unit, the legion) for Emperor Diocletion after George’s father, also a military officer, and mother passed away.

Everything was looking like lollipops and bubblebaths for George. But there was a problem − Diocletion issued an edict saying all Christian Roman soldiers were to be arrested.

And George was Christian.

Diocletion didn’t want to get George in trouble so he offered gifts to George in the hopes he’d convert.

He didn’t.

Left with no other options, Diocletion had George tortured and decapitated. But, in recognition of his faith and loyalty, fellow Christians made George a martyr.

Now, I’m not suggesting you go out there, contradict people and get yourself executed (yes, I know it’s not too likely anyways). But, what I am saying is bear in mind George’s strength. He couldn’t be tempted by anything, including the promise of life, to do something he didn’t want to do − leave his religion.

Everybody’s unique in some way. And, especially as we get older, most confident people believe their way’s right, even when they don’t really know enough to state an opinion. And, sometimes worse, they want you to change to their way of thinking.

Now, writing this on a self-development blog might seem a bit crazy but you need to realize you’re all that matters! There’s only one person you have to live with and that’s the guy in the mirror. Everyone else, however painful it may be, can be slap-shotted aside.

Though you should seek to learn and be reasonable with others, and while acknowledging there are things you’re ignorant of (keep cool… we all are of something), you need to know what’s important to you, deep down, and stick with it no matter what. George didn’t want to live life without Christianity and was willing to sacrifice himself for that. There are things just as important to you − maybe your family, your work, your business − and you’ve gotta be that loyal to them.

Just because others tell you it’s wrong doesn’t mean a thing.

It is your life you’re living.

Talk to you later!

Alex H.

If you liked this Graceland Ontario post, you might also like these other updates:

• Graceland, Ontario: The Time Trap
• Graceland, Ontario: A Lesson from Steve Jobs
• Graceland, Ontario: The Karate Kid Love Lesson
• Mean What You Say
• Storm of the Century

If They Don't Agree, Laugh At Them

 

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location to learn the success lessons of the greats. Today, we're going to talk about the importance of keeping a sense of humour.

As most of you know, it's April 1st today – April Fool's Day. And, despite my best intentions to the contrary, I'm going to be nice to you and not attempt to fool you (umm... seriously).

April Fool's Day (celebrated in some countries by people playin “April Fish” on others – sneaking up on them and putting a paper fish on their back) had interesting origins – when January 1st was becoming the new-fangled official day of the New Year (believe it or not, the beginning of April used to be the start of the new year), the adopters of the new tradition would laugh at those who hadn't caught on. There was little doubt that they would eventually – why else laugh at them?

To me, it shows a great lesson – when someone or some group doesn't agree with you, take a good laugh at them. Not the people – they may be as smart or smarter than you – but at what they stand for.

It gives you perspective.

You, see many times we feel like we're the ostrich in the life boat, the only person believing in our idea, scared others will rip us apart and not agree.

But when we take the opposite viewpoint – that we're right and everyone else's view points aren't more than a joke, it give us fortitude to keep pushing on, whatever the obstacle, whatever the opposition.

Laugh a lot and see you next week!

Alex H.

If you enjoyed this update, you might also appreciate these posts:

• Graceland, Ontario: Words of Wisdom: Vince King 
• Graceland, Ontario: Bruno Mars Learnt from Elvis... Why Wouldn't You?
• Graceland, Ontario: They Were There When You Were Born
• Elvis meets Cary Grant: It's all About Who You Associate With
• Graceland, Ontario: They Gave Then, Now It's Your Turn

The Ides of Success

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success advice from the greats. Since today is the legendary Ides of March, the day Julius Caesar, general and dictator, was murdered by the Roman Senate, we’re going to do a post in his favour all about having faith.

Back in 50 BC, Caesar, a Roman war hero and conqueror of Gaul, had made a couple enemies in the Senate, including his once ally and fellow general, Pompeii. Caesar was ordered to disband his legion and come back to Rome by himself to meet his fate.

But Caesar wasn’t a huge fan of people choosing his fate for him. Against the odds, he went with his Thirteenth Legion, crossed the Rubicon River and headed towards Rome, completely outnumbered.

But Pompeii and the Senate didn’t want to fight the illustrious Caesar. And, against all probabilities, Caesar went from fugitive to dictator of Rome.

Now, there were still political issues − you don’t get assassinated when there aren’t any. But, the point remains, Caesar had faith.

You see, he didn’t care that the chances were against him. He knew if he went back by himself, gave up without a fight, chances are he would’ve been killed. His actions to the contrary won him control of one of the most powerful civilization’s in our history.

More, it bought him years of life he wouldn’t have had, despite his unfortunate demise.

Be like Caesar (well, don’t get murdered). Even when the odds are cast against you, even when the situation looks bleak, if there’s a chance your pushing a little harder for a little longer will bring victory, any possibility, give it a try. Have faith, even when the situation is moving against you.

Who knows, you might win out and become next dictator of "Rome", wherever that may be for you, now and in the future.

Talk to you next week!

Alex H.

• Graceland, Ontario: They Gave Then, Now It's Your Turn
• Graceland, Ontario: Elvis, Sir Isaac Brock and the Success Constant
• Graceland, Ontario: What's Your Lucky Number?
• Graceland, Ontario: The Elvisian Diamond Jubilee Special
• Graceland, Ontario: Give Back
• Graceland, Ontario: Getting Others to Believe in You (the Elvis Way)

They Were There When You Were Born

How’s it going Ladies and Gentlemen?

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success advice from the greats. Today we’re going to talk about the importance of family.

So, this was not a completely unwarranted post; in my province of Ontario (in the fair country of Canada) we have a provincial holiday today called “Family Day”. Given that, this post seems obvious.

But, to a lot of people, the importance of family is not obvious.

Many people build horrible relationships with their parents, siblings, aunts and uncles. Maybe it’s because of their relative’s outspoken view on politics (which they feel they can spout on you at any given time, their prefab audience). Maybe it’s because when you told them your ambitions they responded with a knee-jerk “It’ll never work… go to school and get a real job”. They have what Dr. Wayne Dyer calls “memes”, mind viruses that they just can’t wait to pass onto you (“money is limited”, “anyone who’s successful is simply lucky”, “you can never accomplish your dream”).

So, you throw the coffee away with the old kettle; you assume that because your family can be a huge hindrance to your growth that you should not associate with them.

Now, there is some logic to this; if you stay away from those who are babbling stupid, negative perspectives, you will keep more focused on accomplishing your goals. That being said, your family does have one thing going for it.

Unconditional love for you.

Now, you can get this from a good friend or an endearing relationship but no one gives it better than your Mum or Dad.

I mean, some people have horrible families who are legitimately dangerous. I’m not talking about those people (you can stay as far away as you like from those). But many family members mean well in general. They only say the things they do because they love you, because they feel you should care for them as they do for you. And sometimes this is a bit of chore. But let me tell you something.

I remember the day my brother came home from the hospital. My Mum came over to me − I was only three years old − and said, “whatever happens, whoever you meet, however you end up, you’ve got him − a friend for life”.

And you know, more often than not, it’s been true. I’ve been on some rocky seas. Hell, my boat just about got turned into siding for the seabed. But whenever something went horrible, my family’s there. Not because they supported my dream, not because they agreed with what had crashed down upon me. They cared because I was of their bloodline, a relative. And a good family provides the best trampoline you could wish for when you’re falling head first from the top of an apartment building. Even if they didn’t (and still don’t) believe you can be a superstar at your work.

Now, what I’m saying is this: love your family, whoever they are, whatever they think. Most of the time they’ll love you whatever you do. If you know it’s not going to go over too well, you don’t have to tell them your plans. It might not be to your benefit. But their love, the confidence they put in you, will always be of use. Especially when you’ve been hurt, especially when others don’t believe in you.

Especially when you aren’t even sure to believe in yourself.

Love your family, have a great day, talk to you later.

Alex H.

If you liked this Graceland Ontario post, you might also like these other updates:

• Graceland, Ontario: Love Will Teach You Persistence
• Graceland, Ontario: Violence on the Roads: A Lack of Humanity
• Graceland, Ontario: Getting Others to Believe in You (the Elvis Way)
• Graceland, Ontario: It's Quicker with Experience
• Graceland, Ontario: "Image Scrimmage"

The Only Guarantee

Hey guys,

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario where, once again, we'll be exploring the success principles demonstrated by Elvis Presley and see how they can be used in your life. Today, we'll be talking about the effects of acting and the effects of not... something I call The Only Guarantee.

I’ve got a question for you: Why do people do exceptional acts? Because it’s monumentous and it boosts their feeling of self-worth. Now, I’ve got another question for you: Why do people not do exceptional acts? Because it’s monumentous and they’re scared it will decrease their feelings of self-worth.

Do you notice the difference between the two questions? The first one, the one about doing monumentous things, talks about action: doing the act makes you feel awesome. The second question talks about an imagined possibility; they’re scared (read: they think) failure will lower their feelings of self-worth.

We’ve talked about Elvis making a fool of himself in the past: he couldn’t finish his first tour in Las Vegas in ’56 because he was going over so badly with the audience. Then, in later life, he put on a lot of weight. Some people would have been so embarrassed about their physical condition they would never want another picture taken.

But not Elvis. You see, he realized that this perceived fear of failing and lowering of self-worth is not a guarantee. He lived through it and we’ve seen the results years after his death. Failing in Las Vegas was not the end of his career. Not only did he continue doing well in the 50’s, later on he became one of Vegas’s great symbols. And people still buy the tracks and posters and memorabilia from his ‘fat’ period. He might have looked upon it as a low period, but to us he’s still Elvis, putting out those tracks the same as usual.

There’s no guarantee that failing will ruin you. You can only take it as you will, as a crippling loss or a lesson to be learnt.

On the other hand, doing something momentous produces guaranteed results. I mean, once you’ve done something incredible , no one can change that. They can show their jealousy through criticism and slanted reviews but the act remains the same. The act is certain, it is a guarantee, and that guarantee not only boosts your feelings of self-worth but others’s feelings of admiration for you.

Now, using some commonsense, the guaranteed result will help you, the perceived loss will not. The guaranteed result is certain and unchangeable, the perceived loss is flawed and easily changed. The guaranteed result shows others you’re awesome, the perceived loss is only seen at its worst by you.

As Elvis is remembered for his great successes, the acts he accomplished, and not the perceived (and often overlooked) downfalls, we too can learn. We can learn that doing, or at least aiming, to do great things will take you much farther than any perceived loss. We can learn that most people only care about those who attempt at success, even if they don’t achieve it, rather than those who never try out of fear. But, most importantly, we can learn that when we have a dream and it is our choice to go for something momentous or ditch it out of perceived fear, we can go for the momentous act and attempt victory over our dreams.

Elvis’s Lessons:

The act of doing something momentous is the only guarantee; it will increase your feelings of self-worth and the respect others hold for you. The perceived threat of failure brings no guarantee; it can help you learn or destroy your soul. Ultimately, as Elvis showed, going for something monumentous is the only way to achieve a dream and, at the very least, attempt success − it’s the only way to live a fulfilling life where both you and others believe in yourself.

P.S. If you're interesting in seeing Elvis singing some momentous soul music, here he is with "Trying to Get to You" from the 1977 CBS TV special, Elvis in Concert.

P.P.S. Remember to leave a comment either below this post or email me at alexghilson@gmail.com to discuss any of my work. I'd love to hear from you!

The July 4th Special (Or July 1st for Us Canadians…)

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario where we’ll be discussing the principles that made Elvis Presley so successful and see how we can implement these into your life. Today we’re going to be talking about July 1^st, July 4^th and patriotism mixed with symbolism (trust me: all these big words will make sense shortly).

For Americans, July 4^th (and for Canadians, July 1^st) is one of their big holidays. In America, it’s Independence Day, the date where the U.S. as we know it today was born. July 1^st was Confederation/ Dominion Day when Canada took control of its own government from Great Britain. For both countries, it’s a day to remember.

And what happens every Fourth of July or First of July? Everyone relaxes, parties, has a good time (I was camping with friends in Northern Ontario near Sauble Beach this year) − and oftentimes they’re very patriotic about their country. They show symbols like the Star and Stripes (the Maple Leaf in Canada) and listen to ‘American’ (or ‘Canadian’) music. You know, those people who are synonymous with your country. Canada has a couple − Gordon Lightfoot, Stompin’ Tom being big but also Celine Dion, Shania Twain, these days, Justin Bieber − even Michael Buble! But the U.S… you guys have Elvis.

With the exception of perhaps Stompin’ Tom in Canada, nobody comes close to Elvis’s patriotism. He lived in a year round Fourth of July spirit (like John Wayne). Maybe you’re bigger on that stuff in the U.S. or something but WOW! did they have spirit.

Elvis was in his country’s army, he sang songs like “American Trilogy”, showcasing big American songs “Battle Hymn of the Republic”, "All My Trials" and “Dixie”. He even wrote a letter to President Richard Nixon to arrange to become a “Federal Agent-at-Large”! Now, we don’t know if he wrote simply to get the badge or if it was an attempt to help his country. But we do know how he was portrayed.

Elvis is America’s ambassador to the world, what one would think the perfect American to be − honest, humble, trustworthy, hard-working. And America realized this. Elvis was wearing an Eagle-emblazoned (the Eagle is a symbol of the U.S.) jumpsuit when he sang the first globally broadcasted concert − Elvis: Aloha from Hawaii! − in 1973. And on hearing about his death, President Jimmy Carter made a public announcement saying,

Elvis Presley's death deprives our country of a part of itself. He was unique and irreplaceable. More than 20 years ago, he burst upon the scene with an impact that was unprecedented and will probably never be equaled. His music and his personality, fusing the styles of white country and black rhythm and blues, permanently changed the face of American popular culture. His following was immense, and he was a symbol to people the world over of the vitality, rebelliousness, and good humor of his country.

I mean, what a national icon!

But how does this status affect his success?

By being linked to the U.S., as long as the U.S. is doing well, Elvis is doing well − in image at the least. He’s shown all over the place and played whenever the Fourth of July comes along. Like Bing Crosby with Christmas, he gains a new following every time there’s need to put on “American Trilogy” again. And because of his national identity, people who love their country because of military service or government service or whatever find a hero and friend in his music. Someone who represents them when 90% of modern music’s going on about how best to party and take drugs while enjoying life with a prostitute. Elvis believed in something big, something wonderful − his country. Sure, they’ve done wrong but his unshakeable believe gave him something to live for, a purpose. And so few people have that. It made him special.

So, what does this mean for you? Take pride in your country. But more so, show it to the world. People will dislike you for taking sides but, heck, they’d probably dislike you if you didn’t. When you take pride in your country, people link you to it and come to you when the Fourth of July (or First of July) comes along. They buy stuff from you because you’re the guy supporting the fun and partying instead of the other people who simply tolerate it for profit. It makes you authentic for believing in what you’re supporting, and people like authenticity. Meanwhile, you earn the respect of customers who know you live for something − your country − however bad the economy is, whatever problems occur in government. That’s not your country. Your country is where you live. And you stand by how awesome that is when others drift and don’t know what they want. Go figure why people’ll want to support you more than they would the drifters. Your belief makes you special and brave for taking a stand for your country, like it did Elvis, John Wayne or Stompin’ Tom, and you’ll be treated better for that.

Elvis’s Lessons:

Take pride in your country and the Fourth (or First) of July. Elvis got boosted big time to icon status because of his pride, leading to the Elvis: Aloha from Hawaii! concert − the first globally broadcast concert, a peak in his career and success. He took a stand for his country when others were drifters. When you take a stand, too, people respect you for believing in something and having a platform compared to others. You’re brave enough to support your country when others are too scared to. Meanwhile, people also go to you because you support your country and the partying in commemoration of it when others simply tolerate it for profit. They’ll sense your authenticity and belief and want to buy from you instead of the competition. It might take time but it will happen eventually. It did for Elvis and it can for you. Bet on it.

P.S. If you’re interested in seeing Elvis celebrating his country with “American Trilogy” at the Aloha from Hawaii! Rehearsal Concert, here’s a Youtube clip of him showing his country at its best.

P.P.S. Remember to leave a comment below or email me at alexghilson@gmail.com to continue the conversation. I'd be glad to hear what you have to say.

Getting Others to Believe in You (the Elvis Way)

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen and thanks for tuning into Graceland Ontario. This week’s update regards being taken seriously (and you already know how important that is for your career and life). We’re going to talk about assertiveness.

Now, don’t get scared on me because of the big word. Primarily, we’re talking about how you say things. Namely, how confidently you say things. Do you remember when you were a kid and you liked the pop songs that came out? And some of those songs had ‘sexy’ lyrics that sounded good on the radio but when you read them aloud, you always felt embarrassed. You know, words like ‘baby’ (the type over three years old) or lines like ‘I love you’. There was something about them that, for whatever reason, when you went to say them, your tone changed and you never sounded as convincing as the people singing on the radio. You felt awkward saying them, you weren’t assertive, and this made you less convincing.

So, it boils down to whether you’re convincing or not. I mean, if you’re doing a presentation and you have ‘baby’ syndrome − you feel awkward saying what you’re saying − then it kills the passion you’re speaking with. It kills your assertiveness. And people won’t believe you, not really. And man, that sucks when you’re trying to sell a vacuum cleaner.

The same problem comes up anytime when you’re presenting or performing. Take dancing. A lot of people get awkward when others ask them to dance. Even if they’re really good, they tend only to waddle side to side. They do this because they don’t want to embarrass themselves by pulling an all out Fred Astaire and really going for it. But, ironically, by not being assertive and not going for it, they make themselves look like a real idiot.

The key is to know what to do and when do it. Really do it, like your life depends on it. And when you go with that passion and let all the stops out, people will believe in what you’re doing. They’ll believe because you believe. And once you’ve convinced yourself, you become much more assertive and it becomes much easier to persuade others that you’re right, or good, or whatever.

Take Elvis as an example; Elvis is renowned for both dancing and, especially, singing. Take a look at anytime when he did either, even when he’s messing about with the boys in the rehearsals for That’s the Way it Is. He gives it his all. You believe he’s a good singer because he sings with all his heart. You believe he’s a good dancer because he dances with all his soul. And, man, you can’t look bad when you’re putting all your power behind what you’re doing.

Now, compare this with a high school kid (it could have been anyone) who might look great, sing great, dance great in rehearsal, but stick him in front of people and what happens? He flunks. Why? He didn’t believe in what he was doing. He felt wrong for some reason and had ‘baby’ syndrome. That made him awkward and unassertive and people didn’t appreciate his act.

In short: when you’re doing something right, with assertiveness, people think it’s good or right. If you still do something right but without assertiveness, people aren’t sure whether it’s good or right and it doesn’t work out as well.

Elvis’s Lessons:

Of course, know your stuff but make sure you present/perform it with assertiveness. What is assertiveness? Believing in what you’re doing and showing to others you believe in what you’re doing. Once you believe and give it your all (when you become assertive), it becomes much easier to come off well and persuade others that you’re right when even you didn’t believe you were. And, seriously, you want others to think you’re right!

P.S. I'd be glad to hear your feedback on my writing and the topics I cover, either through the comment box below or through my email at alexghilson@gmail.com It's OK, I won't bite.

P.P.S. If you'd like to see assertiveness in action, here's a Youtube clip of Elvis singing "I Was the One" from the Elvis: That's the Way it Is. Notice the conviction and assertiveness Elvis puts into the song even though he's forgetting the words (and notice how people love it all the same).