Graceland, Ontario: Gratitude

Showing posts with label Gratitude. Show all posts

Sunday, June 16, 2013

He Was Always There

Since it’s Father’s Day, I figured I’d keep in the spirit of things and write about one of my favourite quotes:

”When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.”

– Mark Twain

If we all lived perfect lives, we’d like to like ourselves. This means doing the things we want to do and saying the things we want to say. And being right… all the time.

But, clearly, things happen and this isn’t always possible. We want to do something but can only do it given a certain situation, like during the summers or after college.

Still, we like being in charge. And that’s when parents come in.

When you’re young, they tell you what to do − when to eat, what chores to do and what you should be doing for school. But, as you get older, YOU want to be the one making the decisions. Especially in our culture, you feel like you have a right to control the little things you actually CAN control.

And too often you look at your own family and criticize them, saying, “look, they’re such fools! I can live life better without them. Not listening to their advice is a good decision”.

Of course, is it? Sometimes. There are things they don’t know. If you’re from a blue collar family who’s trying to get you a white collar education, starting a business or going into theatre’s probably going to be looked down upon. Does it mean it’s wrong? No. Just, given your family’s experience and belief system, it’s wrong for them.

But there are things that your parents, Dad’s included, do know about. How to shave best, for example. Or what plants to stay away from when camping. Or even, once in a while, how to have a fun date with that girl you met on St. Patrick’s Day.

Simply because others have different viewpoints to us doesn’t mean they’re ignoramuses. Oftentimes there’s plenty we can learn from them. They just don’t know everything. And guess what? No one does.

In this age of broken families and divorces, I’m glad I still have my Dad and my parent’s marriage has endured. Whether your situation is the same or different, give your parents some slack, whatever your age.

After all, you owe them BIG TIME because, without them, there wouldn’t be a YOU!

Happy Father’s Day, guys!

Alex H.

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Friday, May 17, 2013

How Mothers and Bodybuilding are Alike

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success advice from the greats. Today, in light of Mother’s day a couple days back, we’re going to talk about being thankful for getting to where we are today. And I think some of you might be surprised by what I say.

What’s your earliest childhood memory of your mother? If you’re like me, you probably have a couple. I couldn’t tell you for sure which one was first, but I think it’d be of my Mum driving me while I was in the back of her car, playing with me while I watched TV or at Christmas dinner. I remember as a kid always wanting to impress my Mother because I loved her so much. Sometimes, I felt like I fell short.

But, as you grow older, sometimes it’s easy to get the whole “grass-is-greener-on-the-other-side” mindset, in everything. Now, I’m not saying settling’s good, but all of a sudden you feel like you aren’t enough and others are better. And, many times, mothers become embarrassments you’d rather not show your friends.

Now, first off, I’d like to say after dealing with Mother’s other than mine, I’d take my Mum any day over them. They may seem cooler at first, but you tend to find they make all the “mistakes” your Mum makes while tending not to love you as much.

Whatever your relationship with your Mother, it’s important to realize how much you owe them. Without her, you typically wouldn’t have been born (quite literally) and you certainly would’ve grown up to be a different person. You are indebted to her for the way you are today.

But I hear some of you saying, “my Mother was terrible and I hate her and she made my life a mess”. To that I say, even if she contributed to making your life less than it could’ve been, she’s done something great for you. Instead of directly teaching you how to behave, she’s given you a challenge to overcome. And if you’re here, you’ve probably either overcome or are attempting to overcome it. Like the pain it takes in a gym to forge beautiful muscles, she’s given you a barbell to lift up.

And when you make it, you’ll have taken your life to a whole new level.

So, whatever your current situation or relationship with your mother, be thankful. Challenges are learning opportunities. The person who gave you them, or taught you to deal with them, is the person who helped shape your character most.

As Abraham Lincoln said, “All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother”

So do you.

Alex H.

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Saturday, May 11, 2013

Being Thankful for Surviving a Plague of Flying Crocodiles

Helloo0OO Ladies and Gentlemen and welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success lessons from the greats. Today we’re going to talk about gratitude,

As you probably didn’t know, my birthday was the other day and, like happens for most people, I went between happy for all the presents and attention to shocked by the extent of my age. But, thinking about it, I put things in perspective and it might help you to hear my conclusions.

Every year, every month, every day, there’s a thousand things that can go wrong, at least half of them lethal. You can electrocute yourself, poison yourself (in multiple different ways − through cleaning supplies!), you can drown, be murdered, hit by a car, beaten by an angry spouse, and consumed by an epidemic of flying crocodiles. In short, there are a lot of reasons why both you and I shouldn’t be here (and I haven’t even gone into the biological improbabilities of it or the chances of super illness).

Yet, chances are, if you’re reading this, you are! I mean, isn’t it fantastic that despite the overwhelming odds, we’re still alive.

Every birthday provides us with a mark of stability, like the Queen does or the Olympics. It’s something so human and so natural it can’t help but ground us. At this point, it allows us an opportunity to see how far we’ve come since the previous year, to see what went right and wrong.

But it offers something much more… the chance to be grateful that we survived. There’s only so many birthdays you have. If you have one hundred of them, you’re fortunate.

Enjoy each and every one of them and celebrate with open heart. After all, you never know when those flying crocodiles are going to show up, hungry and waiting to take you away before your next birthday.

Alex H.

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Friday, April 19, 2013

Had a Bad Day? Smell a Rose!

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for success advice from the greats. Today, we’re going to talk about appreciation.

It’s also my Mum’s birthday, so this one goes out to her.

When, I was young, my Mum and I had very different opinions on certain things. She liked looking at pretty things in shops, I liked buying toys. She liked gardening, I liked watching television. She liked walking for exercise, I liked gluing the rug (no joke).

She’d say, “isn’t that a beautiful flower?” and I’d nod my head before quickly going on to play. I didn’t understand how you could be happy by watching a flower.

But, as years go by, though we still have disagreements once in a while, I’ve come to understand and live by her perspective.

Everything’s beautiful, even in ways we wouldn’t maybe see at first. Everything’s strong, but tender; colourful, sometimes while looking bland; wonderful while coming across as normal.

And, the more I learn about people, that they like to be liked, that they fancy someone who listens and cares about what they say, that they are, in general, inherently good, the more I thank my Mother. You see, she taught me something most people never learn. She taught me how to appreciate good things and, by not much of a stretch, other people.

Now, before you stop reading because this is either sounding way too new age-y for you or just “soft”, wait a sec.

When you appreciate life, others and yourself, you develop true kindness. You honestly enjoy seeing the best in others. Now, I’m not saying you aren’t already like that. But I am saying we’re all a work in progress and that it never hurts to put in a bit more to up your skills. Through appreciation, it becomes hard for us to be put down and hurt for, as Albert Schweitzer said, “Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate”. It helps us become stronger and more likely to go out there and live a full life because we realize at a deep level how good everything is, even the bad. You’ve gotta be part of a world like that. Sitting out is wasting all the beauty and opportunity. When you have that mindset, you realize the bounty open to everyone and, with your deep appreciation of others, it makes it that much easier to persuade and work with other people to fulfill your goals.

I don’t know how you live, but I’m sure you make a similar choice to me in the morning. You decide to have a good day, no matter what, a so-so day, no matter what, or a bad day, no matter what. Chances are, your day will turn out that way simply because you’ll only focus on the information that makes something a “good”, a “so-so” or a “bad” day. You can go, “wow, she’s looking great for eighty” or you can think, “she’s a week away from the grave”. You can breathe deeply and savour the gift of air or you can complain about pollution.

I tell you, whenever I choose the more positive, more appreciative viewpoint, take what my mother taught me and thank God for the smell of roses on a mid-August day, I always, always feel better.

And, from experience, I’ve learnt it’s not just me.

Happy Birthday Mum and talk to you all next week!

Alex H.

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Friday, November 30, 2012

Three Tips to Show Gratitude During the Holiday Season

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario!

Here, we link the success lessons of Elvis Presley back to your life. Today we’re going to talk about gratitude and three ways to show it to those you love at this festive time of year.

Elvis Presley was all about gratitude. Sure he had faults − we all do. But lack of thanks was not one of them. The stories of the Cadillacs he gave away to strangers are legendary. And, while in the army, the King paid thousands to refurbish his company's day room. And that's not mentioning the parties...

Gratitude is a way to show others that you are thankful for having them. And you are… aren’t you? I mean, those people are on your team and have helped you get this far. You do want their help in the future don’t you?

Is that a yes I’m hearing?

Ok, gratitude.

God knows why the Holiday season's a great time to be thankful. Perhaps because of all the presents that get circulated to family members these days. Perhaps because everyone’s celebrating the world exists and they’re on it − alive.

Regardless, if you want an excuse to be grateful (or gasp! aren’t usually grateful and, like Dicken’s Scrooge, want to clean up your act), here’s your chance.

So, let’s start with the number one holiday way to be grateful.

Cards

Knew I was going to say that one, didn’t you? Well, so what if it’s predictable. It works. And it’s becoming a lost art. Because of email and Facebook and Twitter, everyone is only interested in cyber "thank you's". Well, sure that’s nice. But it lacks the personality of a hand signed card, sent through the mail with a stamp in the upper right-hand corner. Cards are the easiest way to thank those important people in your life without having your house foreclosed on in the process.

Small Gifts

Notice the ‘small’ on front of that? Sure, Elvis gave away Cadillacs, but he also had a larger gross income than you probably do. I didn’t want to put this in because the holidays are meant to be a spiritual time, even if they're highly commercialized. But, heck, in our society, people do tend to appreciate gifts, especially if it’s something they’ll use. Now, watch what I’m going to say carefully: you don’t have to give out expensive things to make people’s day. I know you should know this, but you might forget it. If everytime you go to your friend’s place they can’t find a pen, give them a pack of pens (or a cup to store pens in). If they read a lot but complain they can’t read in bed, give them a booklight. If you’ve got the means, record them a version of you singing “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”. I use the free recording program Audacity (Here's a link to their site, if you're interested). Buy a cheap mic and you're set (give me an email at alexghilson@gmail.com if you want to take that on but aren't sure how).

The point is people, the good ones who’ve saved your thumbs the last year or ten, will appreciate the thought out gifts you give them. Even if it wasn’t from American Eagle and cost under $100.

Meeting Up/ Parties

My personal favourite. Now look, this doesn’t have to be hard. You write an email, or pick up a phone or whatever and ask the guy on the other end if they’re available at this place and time and whether they’d like to meet up and chat. They say yes or no. If they say no, you offer a different date. If they say yes, you look both ways and do a happy dance.

Alternatively, you ask a bunch of friends over to your house (or a booked, outside place) at this date and time, the same way you’d ask them if they were by themselves. If they can’t make it, you wish them a Merry Christmas and move on to the next person. If they all can’t make it, you change the date.

When you've got people coming, you buy a cake, some biscuits, vegetables and coffee. If you can get someone to play some Christmas guitar (or other musical instrument), you get them. You can also add a board game if you have one you want to try. Then, you get together and have a ball.

The greatest asset you have is time. You lose all your money, you can earn it back. You get to the end of your life, you’re done. No pleading out of that one. Busy people with meaningful lives realize this. They realize putting your time aside to make them happy is the greatest show of gratitude there is. And they return the favour by giving their time to see you.

Elvis’s Lessons:

Gratitude is important, and Elvis Presley showed it magnificently. When people realize how much they’re appreciated in your life, they’ll want to help you again the next time. And I’m sure you won’t complain about that. My top three ways for make people feel the love at this time of year is by giving cards, small presents, or meeting up/ holding a party. Good luck with the results; I can’t wait to hear your success stories!

P.S. If you’d like to hear Elvis singing If Everyday Was Like Christmas, here’s a Youtube video of it.

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Thursday, November 22, 2012

Here's to Thanksgiving Day, Time to Eat, Love and Play

Helloo0O Ladies and Gentlemen!

Welcome back to Graceland Ontario, your one stop location for linking the success lessons of Elvis Presley back to your own life. Today, we'll be talking about, what else, Thanksgiving!

This is a little strange for me - up here in Canada, Thanksgiving's always in October. But, given my larger American base, I figured I postpone this post until your one came along.

Thanksgiving is different depending on the country you celebrate it in. In Canada, apparently it could date to when Martin Frobisher landed in Hudson's Bay back in 1572. He had a meal of thanks for the survival of his crew after their long journey. Another story is the settlers Samuel de Champlain brought with him to the Canadian province of Quebec started it with a successful harvest. In the U.S., the Plymouth story is the most well known, when Pilgrims in modern-day Massachusetts had a meal of thanks, also to celebrate a good harvest. Their feast became annual and turned into Thanksgiving. Elsewhere, such as the U.K., the idea morphs into Harvest Festival, which farmers would celebrate for a good crop.

All in all, the message remains the same - be grateful.

Nothing like a basic concept to catch on. Yet, Thanksgiving so often becomes an expression for different activities - football, family, dinners. Those are great, but one must remember to be grateful for those things and not take them for granted.

"Yea, yea," you say. Your parents used to tell you to be thankful for your food cause the kids in Africa didn't have it. Then your teachers told you to be grateful for having such an incredible education system (what did they expect? That you'd suddenly like math homework). Gratitude, like many good things, probably has a pretty poor connotation in your books.

And I don't blame you. I never took the word too seriously either. It's long, it's hard to say and it never used to mean much to me.

But then something happened. I don't recall what it was - maybe when I read my first self-development book, Dr. Robert Schuller's You Can Be the Person You Want to Be. Or when, after years of heartbreak, I finally learnt how to ride a bike. But suddenly, gratitude became so important.

I recall being told that gratitude simply meant great attitude. And really, when you're grateful, everything seeems better. It's like something that was ok for years, maybe brushing your teeth, maybe Mum's pea soup, all of a sudden tastes ten times better. Heck, even holidays like Thanksgiving seem better than before. Why? God knows. Perhaps you just appreciate it more than you used to.

Now let's look at our friend Elvis Presley. He was grateful, had a great attitude, and it doesn't take much for someone who didn't even know him to tell. I mean, look at his shows. He's always thanking people, shaking their hands and kissing them. You don't do that unless you really appreciate someone, unless you're really grateful they're your fan.

And then, there's that smile. It doesn't matter when you see him in his life or where - whether it was during the Ed Sullivan show, on a movie set, after the '68 Comeback Special or three months after his divorce. He was always beaming. You see, when you're really grateful you can't contain it. It's like a force just trying to burst out of your system. And when it does, it does it in different ways. The most notable one is smiling. But, it also reflects in your body language, in what you say, in how you perform. I mean, wouldn't it be great to do a better job at work simply because you enjoy life more? It's a win win situation.

Furthermore, Elvis gave back. Wait a second, you're thinking. Isn't gratitude about being glad about receiving? Well, yes. But it also makes you want to give back, to make other people happy. To make them feel gratitude, too. Because when they're happy as well, they're gonna make you feel even happier and then you're gonna make them feel happier and then they'll make you happier and then you'll make them happier and then - I think you get the point.

But how do you get a great attitude?

My number one tip is to make a list about all the great things that happen in your life. The easiest way is to write three things that you're glad happened in your life everyday - a journal.

Another way is think about why you're glad you know somebody. It can be a parent, a teacher, a boss, a friend, a cashier at the local market. All that matters is you think, "Why do I like this person?" The answers will make you happy. And the best part? You can go out and tell that person later and make them feel better, too!

Thanks so much for reading, have a frickin' awesome Thanksgiving, enjoy the football, enjoy the family, enjoy the food and see you next week for the start of our Christmas series!

Elvis's Lessons:

Remember to be grateful, to have a great attitude. It's the name of the Thanksgiving season after all. But too many people forget this. Elvis was grateful. He loved his fans, smiled and gave back to the community. To build your gratitude muscles, you can write a short journal everyday or think of why you love somebody - and then tell them!

Have a great Thanksgiving and see you next week for the start of our Christmas series!

P.S. If you like this post, drop a comment below or email me at alexghilson@gmail.com. I'd love to meet you and discuss this post over this Thanksgiving weekend.

P.P.S. If you're interested seeing Elvis singing a song of gratitude, here he is with a version of "How Great Thou Art".

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Friday, February 17, 2012

Elvis and the Photographer: A Story of Gratitude

I was just listening to George Klein on Sirius XM’s Elvis radio station (channel 19). Today, as usual, he had an interesting story that demonstrates not only one of Elvis’s many positive aspects, reasons for the King’s continual success, but one that can also be harnessed by you.

The story goes that for Elvis to get back to his room after a show at the International (later the Las Vegas Hilton) he couldn’t get back through the casino without being stopped. So, he would go backstage through the maintenance passages and take the service elevator. With him would typically be about six members of Elvis’s gang of friends, the Memphis Mafia, and about four bodyguards.

On this particular occasion, when Elvis and his entourage got out of the elevator, a man with a camera greeted them by asking Elvis if he could take his picture. Suddenly, Elvis’s bodyguards were on the man, pushing him to the wall and taking his camera.

But Elvis told his bodyguards to lay their hands off the man. When the man was released, Elvis asked the fellow how many pictures were on his camera. The man replied thirty-two whereupon Elvis asked him how he would like him to pose. Long story short, the man didn’t leave until Elvis had posed for all thirty-two shots.

Afterwards, Elvis asked his bodyguards to be easy with his fans because if it weren’t for them, he wouldn’t be where he was.

First off, I’ve gotta thank George Klein for a great story which I only wish I could tell as well as he can. It’s touching to hear a tale of such humanity when many celebrities are pulled into the bustle of their own importance. But more so, humanity is what makes Elvis fans still get the warm fuzzies for him thirty five years after his passing (and yes, I am no exception).

Elvis cared so much for the man that not only did he save him being roughed up and give him a picture, but he gave him as many pictures as possible could. Why? Because Elvis recognised that people like that fan were responsible for his success. And even if that man had never bought an Elvis record in his life, the man’s spreading of Elvis’s neighbourliness might encourage others who would.

Elvis realized that no one gets anywhere without something to get them there. Moreover, nobody becomes successful without someone helping them, whether that be a friend, a relative, or, yes, a fan.